Training in Tenderness

The Tibetan term tsewa is difficult to define, but it can be translated, according to Dzigar Kongtrül, as "an open heart, a tender heart, or a warm energy that we express and receive in relation to others, especially those closest to us." This is his compact guide to developing this wonderful quality in yourself--it's a quality that leads not only to a transformation in our attitude toward ourselves and those around us, but that we can actually use to heal the world. According to Buddhist teaching, tsewa is, along with the perception of nonduality, one of the two elements of the heart-mind of enlightenment known as bodhicitta. Learning tsewa can be challenging, Rinpoche teaches, but if we want to be truly happy, there's no alternative, for tsewa is the purest and deepest form of happiness. The other kinds of happiness that we seek are more superficial. They don't mean much if we lack the joy of an open heart. The good news is that we all have the capacity for it, and it's a habit that can be cultivated.